BEHIND THE SCENES… What is your Esteem Status?

surprised babies

I was totally shocked when I realized that not accepting the fullness of who God has created you to be and living in that consciousness is an esteem issue. You know how it is that we choose all kinds of profession, business, investments etc based on certain experiences and reasons. For some of us, growing up might not have been the best and we are like, “mehn,  I got to do this and this, get this qualifications  et al,  so that my kids don’t go through what I went through or so that I can live a better life”. For some of us, observing our parent’s marriage was a total night mare, so we created our own standards and laws all in the name of marrying right and anything short of that, you just can’t deal. The scenarios are endless.

Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong in determining to succeed or turning your experiences as motivation to excel. However, my question is,  who determines the parameter in measuring your success, who or what determines the path we choose? Where does the will of God which was predestined for us come to play? Are we sincerely satisfied by what we do or who we are or do we get pressured when the world calls your achievement “out of vogue”? What exactly is the motivation for what we do and who we are?

I was blessed to have been found by God at an early age of 8, I just love God (which honestly is the working of God in me Abi who put it there) but I must say that while it looks like my life was all about pleasing Him and He called the shot, I still struggled up until last month about certain things like wanting to have a bit of my way doing some other things that looks “successful”, pick some other career path that looks inviting, promising, popular with more applause; or do some “career combo” etc. I did not or refused to see the limitless possibilities in accepting fully what He has called me to be as well as trusting His timing fully. I strongly believe that I might have struggled less, reduced unnecessary pressure and handled some situations better if I had gently accepted my reality in God, not wanting to be something else at the same time. Until you accept who God has made you to be and do what He has called you to do, you would forever compare yourself with another and that is an ESTEEM ISSUE. I love God gaaaaaan (so much) and I will do whatever He wants me to do but I desire to grow to that point when I go ahead to do the will of God per time without looking or asking a few people what they think or seeking for confirmation after confirmation, lol. I know that God’s will can be pretty scary but we should have learnt by now that if its God, you can be rest assured that so far we play our part, we can go to bed, the Chief Fixer (God) will sort us out, do I have a witness!!!


As we grow older, accepting our 1 or 2 or 5 talents as God has given us becomes tougher because of what society is calling success or the path to fulfillment. We would rather desire we had the talent of others or get carried away by what others are doing with their 2 or 5 talents thus neglecting the very thing God created us for. Check out this scripture:

Galatians 6 4-5

The day I entered rest was when my husband sat me down because for whatever reason I felt I wasn’t doing enough, though I was doing all I knew to do. It somehow still wasn’t enough because somewhere in my subconscious, felt I should be doing more. This desire I later realised is as a result that I saw others doing more plus I just entered a season of more responsibilities. However instead of prayerfully allowing the God that gave me more work determine what was MORE, I was all about forming “assistant God” putting myself under immense pressure on to doing God’s will. So is it possible that some pains and pressures we going through are self inflicted??? Just saying.

Anyways God used my husband to ask me a simple question, “Imisi what has God told you or asked you to do” ? I had just a single answer . Then he knowledgeable said do that one first na and let God let it grow.  He went further to ask  “why are you finding it difficult to celebrate what you doing now and what God is asking you to do” Then It dawned. I was unconsciously beginning to compare myself with people, I was so bent on becoming a renowned success in certain fields” Honestly, I was too shocked at this discovery that I was angry at myself fa, I am like, “ehn, I am comparing myself ke, Choi where is this competitive spirit coming from” Still lost in my thought, God interrupted and said, “madame, stop being too hard on yourself, na my Grace o all this while o, because you have never seen a trait doesn’t you not capable of such”. Another lesson, is it possible that your supposed esteem is tied to things, achievements, level of influence, people in your life,  wealth? etc. Please do a quick and honest check; what is self your esteem/worth tied to. From that day, I rested, i am so loving my life and it’s amazing how I now see many things I was struggling to see. Guys, we can aspire for great things but always check if it is His will for us and what is the motive behind all we do.

So I want to leave you with some questions and I will continue  from there in my next post.

Let’s put your dream to test/check our esteem level:

  1. The dream you are pursuing or about to pursue is it really your own? Why are you doing what you doing? Is it really because you love it?
  2. Why exactly do we struggle with doing the thing God wants us to do? Is it because we have been carried away by someone else’s life that we think anything other than what they have is less.
  3. Why exactly was I created? What exactly did God have in mind when He made me?
  4. Do I really know and understand who God is enough to know who I am and the blessings available to me?
  5. Are you proud of yourself? Or you busy appreciating everybody but yourself? Or you look down on yourself?
  6. Do I feel threatened by some people or someone? If yes, why?
  7. Do I truly love myself.

I love you guys and I hope this new series, “Behind the Scene” would bless you all. You can reach me via IG: talktoimisi , Twitter: imisiowolabi or send me a mail

See you soon.